47. Boundaries in Alienation - Why They Never Seem To Work


Boundaries...  As a target parent, I'm sure you have some thoughts around this concept. 

For years, I truly thought they were a way to politely control the person I was setting a boundary for. I thought I could use them as a tool to somehow entice my SO to straighten up and fly right.

I read every boundary book I could find. In fact, I believe my first Audible books ever were the Boundaries (series) by Dr Henry Cloud. But because I wanted this "tool" to perform an impossible task, they never worked. Like EVER.

Instead, I found myself doing a whole lotta scheming -- leading only to frustration, confusion, & exhaustion.

Boundaries, when executed properly, are about being responsible for yourself... providing empowerment, actually making them an irreplaceable tool to promote & to build closer relationships (as opposed to keeping ppl out).  OTOH, weak or no boundaries promote enmeshment and emotional childhood, which only create distance between you and the person you are in relationship with.  

In this episode:

  • what a boundary is
  • what a boundary isn't
  • boundaries vs. manuals
  • how to set a boundary from a place of love/security with other adults
  • parental alienation and boundaries
  • how to set a boundary with your children

⭐️Download the Boundaries Worksheet/PDF!! https://www.beyondthehighroad.com/boundaries ⭐️

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Karen Woodall post (moms): https://karenwoodall.blog/2023/07/16/boundary-holding-in-the-face-of-rejection-of-mothers-by-their-children-alienation-caused-by-coercive-controlling-fathers/

".."(Dads): https://karenwoodall.blog/2023/07/23/boundary-holding-in-the-face-of-rejection-of-fathers-by-their-children-alienation-caused-by-enmeshing-mothers/

 

 

 

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